11th chemo tomorrow

I go in for chemo #11 tomorrow. They are getting so much harder towards the end. I get so sick just thinking about going. I cry alot now, I think a little depression is kicking in. Chemo is such a devastating thing to your mind and body. Feels like your being poisoned to death slowly.

My good friend & next door neighbor, Rusty, is taking me again to my chemo treatment. I get so sick now that they have to sedate me during the few hours while the IV poison in being pumped into me. I can't drive home. Rusty is such a good friend, he's been through alot in his life medically too so I think he is very understanding of my disease. Mark said he will go with me to my last chemo. It's hard for him to go with me because he works the night shift and needs to sleep sometime and chemo treatments usually last from 9:30am to 2pm or so.

My sister-in-laws, mother-in-law and me all went away last weekend to stay in a cabin in the woods by Patoka Lake. We had such a nice time. It was just what I needed, to get away from the hubby, kids and housework, relax & not be reminded by anything of my disease. We just talked, sat in the hot tub, acted silly and laughed alot.

Sunday night on Extreme Home Makeover, they featured a family in St. Meinrad, Indiana that was so similiar to us. The wife has cancer, they have small children & a little boy who reminded me of my little boy Cody. The wife's mother also had breast cancer and survived. My mom had Lou Gehrig's disease but didn't survive, she died just 4 days after my high school graduation.



Fred said...

Mallory,
This morning when I got you email I was so happy to receive it. Thank you for taking the time to write. I have been in Taiwan almost four years and rarely hear from the old gang. Of course, I don't have all their email addresses so they don't have mine. I then went to you blog and cried. Luckily a friend of mine was here to embrace me. I am so sorry that you are going through the pain that you are and pray that it works for you. Regarding my cancer, I am living with it. I have no pain. I am doing Ren Dian, acupuncture, Qi Gong (ChiGong), and herbal medicine. I am avoiding the Western medicine. I am a bad patient and don't always follow the doctor's advice. But, I am happy and have a good attitude. That is most important. Keep the faith, honey. Pray and you will make it. I once again thank you for sending the video about "I Have Cancer, but Cancer Does Not Have Me". It has been an inspiration to me. Thank you for all your sharing and may God bless you and yours!

Yours from Taiwan,
Fred